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                      Religion: Life in the rocks, and not getting any better... 12/12/2009
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                      Hey there KIH. Let me get straight to the point.

                       I feel like everything in my life is going wrong and it’s not getting any better. My family just keeps fighting with each other. I understand that every family has their problems and I know as a Muslim I’m supposed to be patient but I just can’t handle it anymore. Is there anything I can do or pray to make this better? I’m going crazy and school is already frustrating me…my family is one stressor too many.

                      --Sister.

                      Assalamu Alaikum,

                      I totally understand how you feel. Exams are coming up, and assignments are due, and that’s pretty much the biggest bump in the road we students have to face. I know it’s hard and so far, from what I understand, you’ve been doing your best to be patient and understanding about your situation.

                      Allah, the Exalted, says: "O you who believe! Endure and be more patient." (Qur’an- 3:200) The patience you are exhibiting right now is the best idea. Also, try to avoid expressing any anger at your family. That is the worst way to end the problem, trust me. 
                      I suggest that you should talk to someone like a close friend about what you’re feeling. That’s usually the best way for me to feel better when I encounter a problem that I feel helpless about. Try not to keep things bottled up.

                      If you are close to your family, then may I suggest that you try and speak to them about how you feel? Maybe they don’t realize that it is affecting you as much, or perhaps they need to realize that it’s time to put things aside and love each other for the sake of Allah.

                      One thing that is important though, I think, is that you need to remember to focus on your school work, whatever it may be. I know it may be hard to ignore the problems at hand, but try and prioritize; tackling one thing at a time will really help ease the tension. Just keep in  mind that "Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in full, without reckoning.'' (Qur’an- 39:10)

                      To do this, it may be best if you try to separate yourself from the situation - try to spend more time at school, on campus or with a friend. When you're at home, try to stay uniDistance yourself from the situation so you can get some perspective, and some peace of mind.

                      I really hope this helps. I don’t have extensive Islamic knowledge, nor am I a scholar. If you feel that you were offended or hurt in any way possible, please feel free to let me know, and I apologize in advance. Wa’laikum Salaam.
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